Hi. I'm back. Blogger. Idk why this helps, but it does. Actually, I do know why... I started reading some of my old high school and college papers last night (yes, I saved those!), and started reading one from my junior year in high school about the "Nature of Expression." I go into depth about expression, and the nature of it. Lol. The point is... is that I talk about how expression is essential in life. Like actual life. Like, if you don't express yourself, you will literally die. So we must, express ourselves, in some way, shape, or form.
Today has been an off day, and depression has hit big time this week. It hit hard, like a hurricane. Or a brick wall? For some reason I have seemed to lost my way in the nature of expression. It was so easy when I was younger.... But good thing here come the tears right now as I type away... Expression is cathartic, and it is a must.
I'm in mid-production for recording my (technically) debut studio album. It's been 15 years since my last studio project (which was an EP), and I have recorded one other EP & two full-length albums since then-- but as solo, self-produced projects that I recorded myself. One was made in my "studio" apartment (Acoustic Sessions), the other in my dad's/my childhood basement (Saturn Returned), and one even on my smartphone (Mixtape). I've only eponymously recorded one studio project (working with other musicians, engineers, co-producers, & my bank account lol) in 2010... So yea. It's been a minute. It's stressful AF and costly, and now I am reminded why I went completely solo in the first place.
But, as they say, the show must go on. And I will complete this album, with the help of others, to the best of my ability, and budget. I wish money wasn't involved at all. I saw a speech on socials the other day of Robert Di Niro talking about art budget cuts (at some high-end film award something-or-other), and he said that creativity doesn't have a price to it. Well, in the art & music businesses, it actually does. Creativity is limited when IT COSTS MONEY TO BE CREATIVE AND MAKE ART IN BUSINESS. That's what business is, money. Art & Business are not a good pairing. Somehow it always seems that one kills the other... But that discussion will have to lend itself to another post.
And yet, I feel better already. I swear, if you are feeling depressed, either go outside in nature (like I usually do), or if you are too depressed to go out in nature (like I felt today), then EXPRESS YOURSELF (I'm hearing that 70's song now :))
It was always journaling or singing for me, and then I bought a guitar at 15 years old, and those journal entries turned into songs. Songs don't come as easy as they used to, but blogging or going back to journaling still does the trick.
So I guess that's all for now.... wish me luck on finishing this album, it's been brutal and might be my last with money/stress put into it. Better yet, since money is involved, you can go and support the project by pre-ordering, "Stories," my debut studio album below (shameless plug!)
Bye for now.
Peace & Love.
Joy
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